just thinkin

So yesterday some friends and I were talking about the middle school years and I realized how much of my mentality is based on those 2 years. Just like how I think people think of me mainly. I wasn't exactly the coolest person in middle school, and I did a lot of stupid things, so now I think that whenever I'm around the people that really only know the middle school me, that they think I'm still a big dork, so I start to feel really small and inferior. Or like when I meet new people, I for some reason think that I'm going to come off as that same middle school me, even though it's been 4 years and I've changed quite a bit. I don't know, it's weird. And I know I shouldn't think that way, because I am not the same person. But a lot of times I do. But I have to say that my brother being home as really pushed me to open up more and introduce myself to more people and feel comfortable doing it. He makes it seem so easy to strike up conversation, and I really look up to him for that. I hope I can force myself to become more like him.